omg i came out as bi to my family because my dad had invited their best employee over, who brought his boyfriend and i tried to come out as bi to my dad before but he didn’t listen so when they asked me where i see myself 10 years from now i told them in nyc or paris with a husband oR WIFE AND MY DADS FACE BUT HE COULDNT SAY ANYTHING BECAUSE HIS ///BEST/// ///GAY/// EMPLOYEE WAS SITTING THERE AND I JUST SAT THERE LIKE
- Intro: State of the Hip-Hop Union Address
- Track 1: How Do My Presidential Balls Taste?
- Track 2: Obamacare For Ya Mama
- Track 3: Vetoing The Pussy feat: The First Lady
- Track 4: Rock the Vote After I Rock Ya Headboard
- Track 5: I Got the CIA Fucking With Me
- Track 6: White House Sanctioned Murder feat: Wild Joe Biden
- Track 7: Government Lockdown (Fuck the Repubs)
- Track 8: Senate Massacre
- Track 9: Executive Branch Evil
- Track 10: Harvard Hitman
- Outro: Re-Elect a Real Nigga When You See One
- Bonus Track: What You Mean Declined? (The Deficit’s Trying To Kill Me)
this track list was too good I had to reblog again
When I finished reading I said to myself, “No fucking way!” Clever… very clever. You win this time.
Uromastyx likes her belly rubbed
this is a fucking lizard getting her belly rubbed if you don’t think that’s the cutest shit then get out of my blog
LOOK AT ITS LIL ARMS FLAPPING AWWWWWWWW
EVERY SINGLE EASTER MY MOTHER HIDES A THREE POUND EASTER EGG IN THE HOUSE AND SETS MY BROTHERS AND I OFF TO GO FIND IT AND GUESS WHO GOT IT FOR THE FOURTH CONSECUTIVE YEAR IN A ROW
NOT THOSE LIL BITCHES
im always like hell yeah i’d survive an apocalypse and then i remember sometimes I nearly faint in the shower because the water is too hot
my friends sister was telling me about how in highschool a guy tried to take a picture up her skirt as she was walking up stairs and she saw, grabbed his phone, broke it in half, and handed it back to him and said “you can tell your mom why your phones broken”
for a second I forgot about flip phones and I was like how in the holy hell did she rip a phone in half
One of these things is not like the others
One of these things is not quite the same
It’s the same, but different.
Can’t. Not. Reblog.